2 Mindset reminders to help you find success

Tiffany Sauder: I'm going to call this episode just like stuff on my mind. There were like two interesting things that happened over the last couple of days that I think are just really great mindset reminders.

So my second daughter loves volleyball. She's getting pretty good at it. She's 12 and she's at that stage where she's like, dreaming of being the best volleyball player on the whole planet. So that's awesome. I love this young, excited dream that she has. And she's putting a lot of energy into it and discipline and all of that our eight year old also recently started hitting a volleyball, like in our garage. and she went to one open gym with like second and third graders. So you know, a very light lift towards this whole idea of volleyball, but we're like, Hey, we're already in the gym for our second one. If there's a clinic or something going on, it's a great way to start getting our eight year old involved in something without having to drive somewhere else. So that's kind of how our third one is like brushing up against volleyball. And my oldest asked me, we were driving and she said, mom, do you think Ainsley likes Ivy playing volleyball? and I said, I don't know. I, I mean, I guess so. I haven't really thought about it. I said, like hits with Ivy sometimes in the garage. So I'm assuming she likes it. Like, it's probably fun to have a little sister.

And Aubrey said, I don't think she likes it. I think that she is. Wants to be the best at it and she doesn't want Ivy to potentially be better than her. I mean, there's like four years between them. It's very unlikely But anyway, she doesn't want to be like kind of the family competition and I said Aubrey that's so interesting But Ainsley is creating contrived scarcity Something that is not actually scarce. She's scarce. Aubrey's like, what do you mean? And I said, well, there's like actual scarcity. So for example, if I make a pan of lasagna, there's only so much lasagna in that 9 by 13 pan. Like, it's a scarce resource. At some point the pan is gone. Sure, you can make some more, et cetera, but like, there's only so many slices of lasagna and only so many people can have a piece of lasagna because then it's actually gone.

But if you look at something like volleyball, The entire human race could play volleyball and there would still be more volleyball available, like it's an abundant resource to learn how to play volleyball. There's not a finite capacity of volleyball knowledge on the planet. There's not a finite capacity of volleyball talent like it is. A resource that can keep growing in abundance. Yes, there's only so many slots on the Zionsville high school team, but they're not even gonna be high school together. We're a long ways away from that. But my point is, like, it's, it's an abundant resource. I think a lot of times we look at, like. Other people's success as an accidental, scarce resource of like, if they are successful, I'm jealous of that. And that makes me think I can't also be successful. Like, no, you can both be successful. I think women, we can look at somebody else who's really fit and healthy and say, I'm jealous of that. Instead of saying, Hey, what they have is an abundant resource being fit, being healthy. It's abundant. We can all have that thing. I don't need to be jealous of you. you're not taking it from me. It's not either you or me. It can be both of us. It's. Actually, an abundant resource, but our minds can make it accidentally scarce. And when we get into these mindsets where we force scarcity into a scenario where it's really not true, we put all kinds of icky things into it. we make it competitive. We, might try to undermine somebody else's success. Like it's not a good, healthy mindset. So it was a reminder for me to look at when is there actual scarcity and when do I actually need to compete or try to get there first or figure out what portion of that is important for my journey and where is it actually an abundant resource, but I might be treating it accidentally as scarce.

I think we can even look like a talent in our businesses as a scarce resource, Switch. At some level it could be true. There's, you know, a finite level of, potential people who could come be the president of my agency or like, that's, it's not an abundant resource, but if you put yourself in the talent development business where you find raw material, like young people who have, you know, great ambition and great discipline and a lot of self management and they're just naturally curious and they're a great self starter. If you put yourself in the business of finding people like that and turning them into who you want, you know, the skills that you need, the digital marketer, I need them to be the strategist. I need them to become, then I change it from a scarce resource. I have to pick from the people who are already developed and I can turn it more into an abundant resource of, Hey, look, I can take raw materials and turn these people into amazing marketers.

So I don't know. I just find this mindset of abundance versus scarcity. To be a really valuable thinking framework and it was just really brought into the foreground for me. after this conversation with my daughter,

The second thing that's, been interesting to me in the last couple of days of I've been navigating my life is I was working out with my trainer this morning and he said, you know, if you look around and you see that there's a program or a strategy or a thing that is working for people and it isn't working for you, oftentimes you are the problem, But people don't want to hear that they're the problem. And so they blame the thing. They blame the strategy. They blame whatever it looks like. And, I am not naturally 1 to 1st admit that I'm the problem. I suspect. I'm not alone in that. And, again, it was just a great reminder that. Sometimes if things aren't working, but it's working well for other people, And I remember like when I started sales training and being like, I don't know how to sell. If I knew what to do, I'd already be doing it. I like to go to these classes and begin training. And at the beginning, it's just clumsy and I'm awkward at it. And I'm not having success because I'm just not that good at it.I could have looked at it and said, well, this isn't working. But I knew to say like, well, the people who are having success are doing this thing. And so if I want to have success, I need to keep at it. but there's been some things I've tried to like grow this podcast that have n't really worked that well.And I can blame the channel or I can look at it and say like, have I been as consistent as I probably could have been? Have I tested as many things as I could have? Have I like committed to the channel in a way that said, I'm going to figure out how to make this successful? Instead of I don't know if it will be successful and just that mindset, I think can really change your energy towards testing and trying or like with, you know, nutrition and dieting and trying to find the right way of eating that works well for your body. Again, I think sometimes our lack of compliance are quitting on it too early, like not reading the fine print, that we actually can be the problem.

So anyways, I don't know if that's very cheerful, but. know, I'm very passionate about figuring out where the locus of control is, and the more often I can put the locus of control with me, I know that that puts me in a place of empowerment to be able to create change and move my energy and resources towards the things that I want out of life. And so this framework of If something isn't working, but it's working for other people, the problem is probably you to me. That's clarifying like, Hey, the locus of control is back with me. Like, how do I get my crap together so that I can make this work?

So anyway, uh, random thoughts from Tiffany, uh, as she motors through the holidays. That's what we'll call this episode. Thanks for listening.