"Being wrong in the short term and being together is far more important?” —Tiffany
Tiffany gives a sneak peek into the Sauder family home sharing what they keep on a three-by-five card, ‘don't be right at each other, be right with one another.’ It's a reminder that nobody wins when you're right at each other. The other person has to lose for you to be able to be right.
How did she get to this understanding and how does it impact her marriage and business? Take a listen. Does anything come to mind for you? Text Tiffany at (317) 350-8921.
Q&A: What is the one thing you knew to be true five years ago, but life has given you a new perspective?
I'm your host, Tiffany Sauder, and this is Scared Confident. So I'm kind of known for my like quick response, not like wit, per se, but just like my brain works fast. And when I saw this question come across a couple of weeks ago, it was one of those I really thought about, um, because it's kind of one of those wisdom moments.
Where you start to see that something you saw initially or took at face value that like life just evolved it. And the thing I came back to was that being right matters. So I used to believe that being right matters. And I would say what life has taught me is that it's actually more important to be together or to be on the same page.
And this has played out a couple of different places in my life. Um, I'd say first and foremost in my marriage, for sure. My husband and I both firstborns, we both are really competitive and we both want to be right. And that just did not serve us well at the beginning of our marriage, both of us just wanting to be right, because when you're right, it's actually.
The other person is wrong, which is not a great feeling, right. When your spouse makes you wrong. And I just started to learn, like, it's actually more important that we're together. So sometimes you're right. And that's true. But at that moment in time, it's not important that you being right is discovered it's okay to like, have a little humility or to be like, okay, I can sort of be open to a different perspective.
And what I have found is with time, Truth tells that story always, but standing your ground and being right for the sake of being right. Oftentimes in a relationship, it doesn't serve the big picture of the relationship. And the other place that I've seen it play out is at work and kind of in two ways with clients, like, you know, we're in the professional services business.
And so there might be things that like we're we're right about, but maybe the client isn't ready to see it yet. And that's okay. Like sometimes you have to be patient with someone's learning or their willingness to accept a different level of truth about a situation. And forcing that on a, I dunno, like a forced timeline, it just doesn't serve the relationship.
Usually at a, at a sort of macro level, a little sneak peek into the Saudi family home office here. There's a little, a three-by-five card that has, don't be right at each other, be right with one another. So we have this little daily reminder, uh, it's been that big of a deal, but I really would encourage you in your relationships.
Nobody wins when you're right at each other. The other person has to lose for you to be able to be right. And really what you often want in the big picture is for you both to win for you both to have a relationship for you both to be right in the fact that you're in a relationship with one another.
So, be okay being wrong in the short term and being together as far more important.
So what else is on your mind? Text me (317) 350-8921 (317) 350-8921. And be sure to follow along on your favorite podcast app. Thanks for listening today.
